Wednesday, April 12, 2006

Trying to be Good -- Lippograms, Bass, and Korean

Eh..

trying to get back to the things I should be doing... Just played 25 minutes of bass patterns and couldn't control anything... siiiigh....

Next back into the Korean...

but I did a funny little exercise in my advanced writing class.. Wrote something quick and then turned it into a lippogram (an exercise without a particular letter, in this case the letter "e")

What did I learn?

• Don't use the past tense if you're going to go lippograming
• The world "the" is difficult to work around
• You find a phrase that works and you can start to feel like Homer rolling out another instance of "the wine red sea."

ORIGINAL

One thing, if you're in confidence games, that the English accent does, is puts you out of normal racial boundaries. I argue this point with my mate Bill all the time. Bill? He's like the "Dim" in my Clockwork. Not the brightest jewel in the crown, but good with dirty work. Every group needs someone who can do the dirty work. I think of him as Dim partly because most of the time he doesn't comprehend my arguments. Like the one about Blacks and Whites in the United States and how an accent helps. We were sitting around watching the NBA on TV and he started in about the increased number of White players in the NBA. He seemed proud.

- They're all from Europe you know?
I started

- Are not?
Bill sipped his beer after replying.

I sighed.
- Who was the last great white player to come from the United States?
I asked. I fully new the answer, before moving to the Big City I'd stayed a bit in Boston and had heard a snoot full. Ear full? Of talk about Larry Bird. Bill, who sometimes departs from scripts written for him, and usually with terrible results, wasn't going off-script in this case.

- Larry Bird
Bill replied.

- Who hasn't been in the league for how long?
Asks I.

- A while
Dim, er.. Bill, responds.

- And since then?

Bill screws his face into the grimace that means he is thinking. His lips move a little and I can see him running through a list in his head. I imagine it to go something like… "Vlade Divac.. no….. Andrei Kirilenko …..no …… Dirk Nowitski .. no…. Peja Stojakovic … er….

Finally his face relaxes….
- Steve Nash
he says…

I smile
- Canada

- No!

I smile again
- Yes, Canada

Bill stares at a point in space, and although I do feel a bit sorry for him, I pile it on.

- Well, I suppose you have Mike Dunleavy?

Bill looks at me suspiciously… he senses this is only bait.

- What about Brad Miller then?

Nice job, I think to myself, but I'm not letting Bill have it really, so I shift back to my point. I go ahead and mention all the White European stars in the NBA.

Bill squints…

- Point is
I say
- that the Euros aren't scared. Something happens to White guys in the US. Whatever it is, they don't get over it. They get intimidated by the Black guys and it causes the White guys to fade away.

And that is how I began to explain the usefulness of my accent to Bill.


WITH LIPPO-SUCTION

A thing in cons, that a British pronunciation attains, is puts you past normal position on colour. I chat about this point constantly with my boy Bill. Bill? A "Dim" in my Clockwork. Not a most worthy diamond in a crown, but good with low work. Any group should contain a man who can do low work. I think of him as Dim partly cuz Bill normally won't cotton to what I am saying. As in my point about USA Blacks and Anglos. Bill and I sat around watching NBA ball on TV and Bill brings up how many Anglos now play NBA ball.

- All from abroad you know?
I start

- No way?
Bill sips his drink post saying this.

I laugh.
- Last outstanding Anglo NBA USA guy was…..?
It hangs in air.
I fully know this. Prior to living downtown Big City I'd hung around a bit in Boston and had got a snoot full. Mouth full? Of talk about Larry Bird. Bill, who occasionally strays off script, and usually with catastrophic payoff, wasn't going off-script for this point.

- Larry Bird
Bill says.

- Who's out of NBA ball for how long?
Asks I.

- uhh… 1989
Dim,uh.. Bill, says back.

- And til now…?

Bill twists his mug into a snarl that shows Bill is thinking. His lips twitch to and fro and Bill is running through a list in his noggin. I think it works similar to slow listing… " Divac.. no….. AK47 …..no …… Dirk Nowitski .. no…. Stojakovic … uhh….

Finally his mug sags calmly….
- Nash… Suns! Arizona!
Bill says…

I laugh
- Canada

- No!

I laugh again
- Yup, Canada

Bill looks at a point off in infinity, and although I am a bit sorry for him, I load it on.

- Luckily, you could say Dun-Dun … Warriors, a forward?

Bill looks suspiciously… suspicious this is only bait. Bill is too smart to grasp at this straw.

- What about # 52 … a Sactown King?
Asks Bill

Good job, I think without words, but Bill can't control this point, so I shift back to my point. I list all anglo stars from abroad playing NBA ball.

Bill squints…

- Point is?
I say
- that without faith you don't win. A bad thing occurs to Anglo guys who play NBA ball. What it might consist of? I don't know, But Anglo guys don't hump past it. Black guys grab top ground and USA Anglo guys wash out.

And that is how I start to limn import of my British pronunciation to Bill.

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