The question is, of course, rhetorical.
Of course it will end and badly at that.
But how cruel is a advisor to ok a thesis and then scarper off to parts unknown until June 5th. I just sit here and obsessively pick at the thing. I've become a more productive version of Oscar Wilde who once wrote that he "spent all morning putting in a comma and all afternoon taking it out."
As I read over that last paragraph I realize the word "productive" isn't quite right, since it implies some kind of useful product.. I have been... protean?... or maybe the paper has become protean and I've become some combination of Narcissus and Mickey Mouse as the sorcerer's apprentice.
Who knows, I never understood British mythology anyway...
But the damned thing is growing again... 17,566 words.
Like the moron I am? I'm going to print out another version and edit the thing...
moron!
Sunday, May 27, 2007
Wednesday, May 23, 2007
Wednesday, May 16, 2007
Jerry Fallwell Dead and my Thesis is accepted.
Now, if Wolfowitz resigns and someone gives me a chocolate bar, my life will be completely happy.
Monday, May 14, 2007
Upon Holding a New Manuscript
There is something frightening about holding, fresh from the mailbox, a manila envelope which contains one of the last two unread works by My Big Korean Author. Because my thesis, already away to the evil powers that be, is done and I don't need anything upsetting the analytic applecart I have painfully constructed from lies, alcohol, hotel stays and misanthropy.
Which is why it is a brilliant that this work brilliantly fits with my brilliant analysis. This is sort of on the bonus "I'm a Genius (As I have always suspected)!" tip. In fact the mystery new piece is a rewriting (or similarly timed) of the problematic piece My Big Korean Author wrote. It is interesting to see that MBKA is bluntly addressing the US and Korea and how our cultures interact. Some of it is still a bit too obvious (The female narrator is named "Han E. Moon") but in general it is a really nice piece and it touches on a wide variety of cultural interactions, both good and bad. If more widely read I'm sure it would offend gyopo and wayguk alike. Which is all one can really ask.
If it ever gets to the book stage, this thing will flow in like butter...
Which is why it is a brilliant that this work brilliantly fits with my brilliant analysis. This is sort of on the bonus "I'm a Genius (As I have always suspected)!" tip. In fact the mystery new piece is a rewriting (or similarly timed) of the problematic piece My Big Korean Author wrote. It is interesting to see that MBKA is bluntly addressing the US and Korea and how our cultures interact. Some of it is still a bit too obvious (The female narrator is named "Han E. Moon") but in general it is a really nice piece and it touches on a wide variety of cultural interactions, both good and bad. If more widely read I'm sure it would offend gyopo and wayguk alike. Which is all one can really ask.
If it ever gets to the book stage, this thing will flow in like butter...
Wednesday, May 09, 2007
Work unclenches...
I was gonna post about how happy I was to be sitting in a bar at 11:30 or so with only one major fucking event left this semester... I swear, I can do the marketing and PIO shit, but I hate event planning...
anwyay.. watching the news I saw something of interest to Swamp Valley College, wrote up a couple of pages for the Limpest President Ever and came to the bar to post it (No intarwebs at home). And there I was enjoying a beer, despite the Karaoke...
Then an asian guy in blue shorts and an Hawaian shirt stood up and started singing "The Sound of Music" in a voice that would make (FFFFVVVVCCCKK! Can't remember her name. Old White Lady Singer the Gays Love Who Was On Shows that Featured Shit Like Ventriloquism) shake in fear....
There can be no peace....
Anyway... Work should become less 23/6 (cause I'm too lazy a fvck to go ALL the way) in the weeks to come...
bonus...
anwyay.. watching the news I saw something of interest to Swamp Valley College, wrote up a couple of pages for the Limpest President Ever and came to the bar to post it (No intarwebs at home). And there I was enjoying a beer, despite the Karaoke...
Then an asian guy in blue shorts and an Hawaian shirt stood up and started singing "The Sound of Music" in a voice that would make (FFFFVVVVCCCKK! Can't remember her name. Old White Lady Singer the Gays Love Who Was On Shows that Featured Shit Like Ventriloquism) shake in fear....
There can be no peace....
Anyway... Work should become less 23/6 (cause I'm too lazy a fvck to go ALL the way) in the weeks to come...
bonus...
Tuesday, May 08, 2007
Long Time No Post: Work And Thesis
It is the death-march time at work.... two weeks of ridiculous events to be planned and run all with the lovely interference of the District Office, which as usual has no idea what is actually happening on the campus. Every time there is a moment to breathe the DO sends down some other insane request. Add to this weekends full of sports playoffs and evenings spent studying Hangul. Busy busy
On an amusing work note, the "Hispanic/Latino" advertising firm which works at our sister college somehow managed to completely miss Cinco De Mayo and not get into the biggest local Spanish-Newspaper. Another triumph for consultancy! This, kind of incompetence, of course, will not stop the chancellor from ramming this firm down our throats, since their president is the brother of an important staff member at the District Office. Famiglia baby!
The "final rough draft" of the thesis has gone off to the advisor. It is 17,359 words of text (footnotes included) and it has gone to a total of 74 pages merely by virtue of adjusting the margins to MLA standards for binding. Amazing. Now I wait with bated breath for the advisor's response. If it is good it is all just formatting after that. And to figure out the paperwork and get graduated.
Assuming graduation, I then begin looking for work in Korea. I would take a job in September if one arose. This is the mid-point of the Korean academic year, so jobs are a bit fewer. It would also be a bit of a rush at this point, but I am ready if it comes to that. If that doesn't pan out I would go in March, but quit work in early January so I can spend some time on the road with the fambly. This would also allow me to bank a bit more.. well.. bank.. Which would be a good thing, as we say.
The BAG is nearly convinced that she should follow shortly thereafter. She has concluded her BA in English and decided she wants to be a teacher. I go and blaze the trail for 6 months or so (and sleep with a lot of Korean chicks!) and she follows for a year. She gets to try teaching, I get my teaching in Korea and we don't have to endure a two-year separation. Love is grand, and all, but two-years might be too much.
This much is certain, once I'm out of my current job it is unlikely that I will take another one much like it. I'll probably also never make this much money again, but at this point that seems unimportant. There is only so much soul to suck.
Since my research in Korea is going to make me a world-famous writer, cultural arbiter and man of wealth and taste, I suppose I shan't need a job.
It is a lovely vision! ;-)
On an amusing work note, the "Hispanic/Latino" advertising firm which works at our sister college somehow managed to completely miss Cinco De Mayo and not get into the biggest local Spanish-Newspaper. Another triumph for consultancy! This, kind of incompetence, of course, will not stop the chancellor from ramming this firm down our throats, since their president is the brother of an important staff member at the District Office. Famiglia baby!
The "final rough draft" of the thesis has gone off to the advisor. It is 17,359 words of text (footnotes included) and it has gone to a total of 74 pages merely by virtue of adjusting the margins to MLA standards for binding. Amazing. Now I wait with bated breath for the advisor's response. If it is good it is all just formatting after that. And to figure out the paperwork and get graduated.
Assuming graduation, I then begin looking for work in Korea. I would take a job in September if one arose. This is the mid-point of the Korean academic year, so jobs are a bit fewer. It would also be a bit of a rush at this point, but I am ready if it comes to that. If that doesn't pan out I would go in March, but quit work in early January so I can spend some time on the road with the fambly. This would also allow me to bank a bit more.. well.. bank.. Which would be a good thing, as we say.
The BAG is nearly convinced that she should follow shortly thereafter. She has concluded her BA in English and decided she wants to be a teacher. I go and blaze the trail for 6 months or so (and sleep with a lot of Korean chicks!) and she follows for a year. She gets to try teaching, I get my teaching in Korea and we don't have to endure a two-year separation. Love is grand, and all, but two-years might be too much.
This much is certain, once I'm out of my current job it is unlikely that I will take another one much like it. I'll probably also never make this much money again, but at this point that seems unimportant. There is only so much soul to suck.
Since my research in Korea is going to make me a world-famous writer, cultural arbiter and man of wealth and taste, I suppose I shan't need a job.
It is a lovely vision! ;-)
Monday, April 23, 2007
So that's why their heads exploded!
Who knew I wasn’t a bored fuckup?
As it turns out I’m a “scanner.”
This according to Barbara Sher. Who more or less had me the first time she said she “just wants to save a bunch of geniuses.” Who among we geniuses can’t identify with being saved? ;-) Her book (path?) is called “Refuse to Choose.”
Apparently my problem is I am such a learning, problem-solving, multi-talented, super-genius that I can’t be expected to finish anything. Additionally (and a slick bit of psycho-therapeutic infusion) any unhappiness I have is because my relatives are too dimwitted to see this and support me properly.
The bastards.
Ms. Sher has developed a line certain to attract many an underperforming egomaniac. Which covers most of the citizens of this fine Republic.
For only $275 I can gain access to all of her wisdom (CD and hardback book!). I started to send away for this stuff, but then I kind of lost interest and did something else. I blame my family.
Now the show ends and.. Oh no.. “renowned teach and spiritual counselor” Irwin Kula may have a different path for me. Time to change the channel. Good thing there is an NBA game on!
In the meantime I will continue to draw my spiritual sustenance from the groundbreaking work of the philosophical collective that was Hüsker Dü:
“If I listened to the things that you said
everything would fall apart
If I did all the things that you do
everything could fall apart
Let's not listen to the things that they say
everything can fall apart
Let's think about our actions before we do them
everything will fall apart
I got nothing to do
You got nothing to say
Everything is so fucked up
I guess it's natural that way.”
As it turns out I’m a “scanner.”
This according to Barbara Sher. Who more or less had me the first time she said she “just wants to save a bunch of geniuses.” Who among we geniuses can’t identify with being saved? ;-) Her book (path?) is called “Refuse to Choose.”
Apparently my problem is I am such a learning, problem-solving, multi-talented, super-genius that I can’t be expected to finish anything. Additionally (and a slick bit of psycho-therapeutic infusion) any unhappiness I have is because my relatives are too dimwitted to see this and support me properly.
The bastards.
Ms. Sher has developed a line certain to attract many an underperforming egomaniac. Which covers most of the citizens of this fine Republic.
For only $275 I can gain access to all of her wisdom (CD and hardback book!). I started to send away for this stuff, but then I kind of lost interest and did something else. I blame my family.
Now the show ends and.. Oh no.. “renowned teach and spiritual counselor” Irwin Kula may have a different path for me. Time to change the channel. Good thing there is an NBA game on!
In the meantime I will continue to draw my spiritual sustenance from the groundbreaking work of the philosophical collective that was Hüsker Dü:
“If I listened to the things that you said
everything would fall apart
If I did all the things that you do
everything could fall apart
Let's not listen to the things that they say
everything can fall apart
Let's think about our actions before we do them
everything will fall apart
I got nothing to do
You got nothing to say
Everything is so fucked up
I guess it's natural that way.”
Sunday, April 22, 2007
Drafted...
The second rough draft of the thesis is now complete at 17,057 words excluding footnotes. Now it goes out to the various readers: The Sister, The Korean, and The Professor. Give them a week to digest the thing (while continuing to do some line-editing) and when it comes back roll it all in and send it off to The Advisor. After his changes, formatting and then, dare I say it(?), approval and binding?
An amusing note about “Barely Accredited Master’s University.” Apparently I need to file some notification of intent to graduate paperwork. How did I find this out? A random meeting with my academic advisor as she sat at a table in our “College Transfer” day. I’m sure they would have got around to officially notifying me about this.
Eventually?
An amusing note about “Barely Accredited Master’s University.” Apparently I need to file some notification of intent to graduate paperwork. How did I find this out? A random meeting with my academic advisor as she sat at a table in our “College Transfer” day. I’m sure they would have got around to officially notifying me about this.
Eventually?
Monday, April 16, 2007
Remembering the Word Count Days
Aaah.. those happy days in which my struggle was to create enough output for this thesis thingie. Now the beast rests at slightly over 17,000 words and I must have cut at least that many out in drafts.
Anyway, I have done three revs this weekend. Obviously it gets easier as it gets better. And between coffee bars and the old-fashioned kind, I have had the sit-down, sit-up and write time that is necessary for this thing.
I think it will go out to my informal editors at the end of this week, and then to my advisor next week. Could it be concluding?
Would be nice. Then off to Korea for a year or so and some more writing.
Or something. ;-)
Anyway, I have done three revs this weekend. Obviously it gets easier as it gets better. And between coffee bars and the old-fashioned kind, I have had the sit-down, sit-up and write time that is necessary for this thing.
I think it will go out to my informal editors at the end of this week, and then to my advisor next week. Could it be concluding?
Would be nice. Then off to Korea for a year or so and some more writing.
Or something. ;-)
Sunday, April 15, 2007
Vacation Land(ed)
When, last spring, my friends (the three of them and some barfly acquaintances) heard that my mother would be flying me and my BAG to Mediterranean climes they chimed in with a lot of jealous palaver.
If by jealous palaver you mean hatred, despair and wishes that I would die.
If I had a dime for every time someone claimed that the Continent would be wasted on me or…
Oh.. wait, they said I’d be wasted on the Continent and they were dead right.
It’s my mom for god’s sake. It’s the Continent for god’s sake. And with all else moms and I share there is also the love of the grape. And there we were, with all that lovely grape juice, pops with a pipe, and the BAG with bookstores. So we all fed the beasts within.
We wandered from lovely place to lovely place.
I, as is my wont, snapped pictures.
I think I’ve covered this elsewhere, but I hate pictures with people in them. To me a picture of an architectural or natural wonder with people in it is like a picture of a porn star with her yeast infection and tattoos showing.
Just wrong… a kind of defilement.
“Hey look Palookaville! I’m here in front of something that dwarfs my pathetic life. But the group tour stopped here before we went to the Microtel (outer) Rome!”
er… this wasn’t supposed to turn all bitter.. the point is..
some of the photos came back to roost in a semi-lovely university publication…
this would be a screen shot…
and this would be a link to the pdf…
as if you stupid tourists care..
I’m off to base-jump into a undersea cavern filled with lo-cal rum, the best margaritas you have ever had, a native guide with a well-stuffed loincloth, slivers of the true cross, and food as the savages themselves kill, prepare, cook, and eat.
Later?
I’ll parasail out with a fistful of antiquities.
So.. like… your vacation sucked compared to mine..
;-)
If by jealous palaver you mean hatred, despair and wishes that I would die.
If I had a dime for every time someone claimed that the Continent would be wasted on me or…
Oh.. wait, they said I’d be wasted on the Continent and they were dead right.
It’s my mom for god’s sake. It’s the Continent for god’s sake. And with all else moms and I share there is also the love of the grape. And there we were, with all that lovely grape juice, pops with a pipe, and the BAG with bookstores. So we all fed the beasts within.
We wandered from lovely place to lovely place.
I, as is my wont, snapped pictures.
I think I’ve covered this elsewhere, but I hate pictures with people in them. To me a picture of an architectural or natural wonder with people in it is like a picture of a porn star with her yeast infection and tattoos showing.
Just wrong… a kind of defilement.
“Hey look Palookaville! I’m here in front of something that dwarfs my pathetic life. But the group tour stopped here before we went to the Microtel (outer) Rome!”
er… this wasn’t supposed to turn all bitter.. the point is..
some of the photos came back to roost in a semi-lovely university publication…
this would be a screen shot…
and this would be a link to the pdf…
as if you stupid tourists care..
I’m off to base-jump into a undersea cavern filled with lo-cal rum, the best margaritas you have ever had, a native guide with a well-stuffed loincloth, slivers of the true cross, and food as the savages themselves kill, prepare, cook, and eat.
Later?
I’ll parasail out with a fistful of antiquities.
So.. like… your vacation sucked compared to mine..
;-)
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