Update on all the Coolest Cats in Spamdom!

I just noticed the first amusing thing about SPAM that I've seen in years. Some of the names attached to SPAM are positively Dickensian in nature. In the last couple of weeks I've seen:

Inebriated U. Nigerians - I bet!

Amparo Otero - A hot-blooded bullfighter

Fannie Beaver - Obviously a woman of ill repute

Twila Valenzuela -A ballerina of international fame before a criminally loose floorboard at the Metropolitan ended her career in a shredding of ligaments and dreams. Now, I fear, she drinks and takes lovers.

Gwendolyn J. Fowler - the wife of the powerful industrialist Gordon J. Fowler who made his first fortune at age 17 in the history-book futures market.

Thaddeus Padgett - whose name is so odd that it never existed.

But Wait! There's MORE!

Husker G. Xenakis - Which only appeals to me because it has part of Husker Du's name in it, and something like the name of the lead singer for Everclear.

Consoles L. Platooning - whose group of Young Republican Spambots fight for Halliburton at day and pary like it's 1959 at night.

Brandy Riddle. All I can say is that as much Brandy as I have ever drunk, I have never solved the riddle. But I ain't buying her dumb stock offering.

Abetter M. Pushing sent me a little note. I don't remember what the note said, but I'm still wondering what he's like in bed.

Philip Zliw (C- for name) sent me an email titled, "Enjoy your lifetime with Individual Increment Internal Secretion." And the weird thing was that the more I thought about an "Individual Increment Internal Secretion?" The more turned on I got, and the more I thought I might enjoy my lifetime..